Track Five: Milli Ways 2 Pay Me

the real kicker of track 5 is that i don’t even have a venmo. i do have cash app and apple pay tho.

i just spent the past week or so writing my nysca/nyfa artist fellowship application. it’s not often there are grants for music or focused on an artist’s vision rather than a specific project. i’m grateful for the opportunity to be considered for the grant. i feel confident in my work samples and supporting statements.

“won’t see ‘til i believe it, difference ‘tween, you and me”

normally the saying goes, “won’t believe it ‘til i see it” but in my version, and in my reality, things don’t seem to get moving until i actually believe they’re going to happen. the faith of my desired outcome is ultimately what makes it happen for me. my belief in myself is what my goals rely on.

“itch on my palm, the money come in. so close to the pinky, who’s buyin’ the ring?”

it’s come to my attention not many people are as superstitious as i am. i don’t remember when i learned that if you have itchy palms, money is on it’s way to you, but i’ve believed it ever since. depending on which palm is itching, right means you would make money, and left indicates that money would be given to you. this is more niche, following the spirituality of right hand equating to giving and the left receiving. the lyric following is implying that the form of this incoming money is a pinky ring from someone. and it better not be rose gold, cause rose gold isn’t pink. plus, i’m a silver girlie anyway.

i don’t walk under ladders. i knock on wood. i pick up lucky pennies or turn them over for someone else. i throw salt over my shoulder. i love to see a ladybug or search for four leaf clovers, and i’ve actually found a few! i’m cautious around mirrors cause my 7 years ended a few years back. i also cover them while i sleep, and keep one across from my entryway into my space to ward off bad energy. i don’t put hats on the bed and i refuse to allow anyone around me to put their purse on the floor. i make wishes when i find an eyelash on my cheek, or put it on my head. i also make a wish when i see a shooting star and grab the rock closest to me to hold on to the star’s energy. when i was a kid i held my breath whenever we were driving past a cemetery. the only superstition that i’m iffy on is black cats crossing my path, because i love cats, and find it hard for them to bring any bad luck my way.

i like when my lyrics reveal something about myself in a small, seemingly insignificant way, because when you open the can of worms, there’s actually a lot of em in there.

the hot water doesn’t work for the tub so we used the sink and a big bowl to fill the tub so i wasn’t freezing lmfaooo

i think out of all the tracks on Baby’s First, Milli Ways 2 Pay Me is the most hip-hop influenced. It’s structure is clear and I think my writing is strong on this track. the visuals followed this clear structure as well. my treatment was sharp with timestamps.

we shot the bathroom scene first, and it became the anchor for the video because of how solid the footage was. chango and san came to my dad’s house with me and we shot in the bathroom there. changos first instinct was to shoot the mirror instead of a direct shot of me. while we often bicker and poke fun at shoots, this is why i continue to ask for their help, i appreciate their eye for the shot. although some of the shots i wanted were really stressful to direct from in front of the camera- just because i see it in my head does not mean i can explain it well- those two really made this vision into a reality. with chango straddling the sink, and san balancing in the pocket door with a flash light, we diy’d it and the transition turned out perfect.

there’s a lot of funny bloopers from this shoot, and while editing this video, i started chopping them out into a new timeline sequence. this is what inspired next week’s drop, so if you’re one of the few actually reading this, you get a lil surprise. enjoy this link to a teaser for next weeks drop, which is a LONG blooper reel. there will be bloopers in this video from visuals you haven’t even seen yet. so it should be an exciting wavy wednesday. it’s my christmas gift to you.

these are still hanging above my bed, my intention was to use them for some sewing work but i fell in love with how cozy it made my room.

the second scene we shot was in my bedroom. i acquired some various green and white fabrics and strung them up behind my bed to create texture and emulate a canopy style bed. my mom had one growing up and i always loved it. this is the cat-friendly version of a canopy bed. although, bunny did take to using the one section as a hammock for awhile until i had to hang it back up.

my aunt, tia, sells jewelry on facebook and graciously loaned me all of the pearls in her possession. some fake, some real, some really pretty, and some questionable. she also let me keep a few of my favorite strands, within reason. i put them all on, around my neck, waist, wrist, fingers, and on my ears. I wanted this scene to portray glamour and luxury in a very obvious and direct way. the fancy fabrics, the expensive and excessive jewelry, everything is intentional.

this red yarn is from my first performance art piece, 6 degrees, presented at agatha falls for afres#1’s wipcital

the third and final scene we shot in the project space while my solo exhibition was active in BICA’s project space, and also on the roof of BICA. in the words of san, the sky was in favor of us. beautiful pink clouds surrounded us as me and san put on welding masks, on loan from the wonderful bethany krull and family, and i lit sparklers to look like i was cutting a hole in the roof of BICA. unseen in the video, i lit the one smoke bomb while it was facing me and burnt the absolute shit out of my thumb. we finished up top and took a break before we started shooting in the project space. silas joined to help with some lighting and security cameras, nick came to help with the vibes. chango was shooting on an hmc-150 on loan from squeaky wheel under my equipment access grant.

this scene was meant to portray me in “super spy mode” as you hear in the second verse. stealing the baby’s first baby, or as maddie named him, alex rodriguez, from his show pedestal. i knew i wanted to shoot this when setting up the exhibition, and this video is a big reason why the baby was in the middle of the show.

everyone helped me spread red yarn throughout the project space to portray lasers. although i had a clear outline of how i wanted this scene to look, and how i only wanted it to be a chunk of the video, versus the normal peppered in way that most scenes are used, i didn’t know exactly what shots i needed. still, it was pretty simple to shoot and ended up being super fun to edit together. i love when the visuals have a storyline, and although it’s not my editing strong suit, i think it captures the audience well. silas came in clutch, fixing a piece of glass to the flashing spotlight for it to turn red, and one of chango’s zoomed worked well to cut into. intentional movie magic helped us make it look “realistic” that i was actually welding, and jumping down from the roof into the project space. i love making things work with what i’ve got. i’m a strong believer that being resourceful is very important to being a creative.

Make it stand out

Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

as i’m wrapping up this tell all, i think i just saw a shooting star outside my bedroom window. i made a wish, reached for a crystal nearby. i think a huge part in creating a life that is desirable for you to live in, is believing the good things with less questions. be open to receiving (left hand, if you forgot) and trust in your intuition. believe that you deserve everything it is that you want.

so yea, it was a shooting star i just saw. and i believe that i what i wished for will make it’s way to me.